Disclaimer: The next few blogs are likely to be pretty emotionally raw. Wait until you have some time. Read with tissue. On my porch today. The first day without a have-to-do-it-right-now list. The first day of “rest.” Appropriately, it is a Sunday. I am bundled in blankets with my little dog Peanut on my lap, … Continue reading On My Porch
grief
Update
It’s no secret Mom and Dad had quite a remarkable love story. It was in no way perfect, but their dedication, commitment and love for each other was unmatched. Since Mom passed, the number one question I get asked is, “How is your Dad?” That is understandable, since their story was well known and since … Continue reading Update
Prayer Chair
I inherited Mom’s prayer chair. It is a fluffy upholstered seat that hugs you when you sit in it. It has a matching ottoman for my feet. The fabric has a white background with a floral pattern of blues and greens. A soothing place to sit. Next to it, is a table with a family … Continue reading Prayer Chair
Memories
Funny how memories work when you are grieving. They come unbidden and they are bittersweet. Mostly sweet. Mostly, I smile…sometimes with tears…grateful tears that Mom is whole again. Birthdays, Christmases, family trips, times with the grandkids, even childhood memories from when I was a little girl, all come forward as I flip through pictures. I … Continue reading Memories
Surprised by Joy
The last few days I have been resting, processing, planning, and resting some more. The cumulative physical exhaustion of the past few years seems to have caught up to me. Yet, it is different than the heavy sleep/sleepless roller coaster of those years. During the dementia journey, it has felt like trying to sleep with … Continue reading Surprised by Joy
It’s Over
Dearest Readers, Our long goodbye is over. Mom breathed her last today and now she is whole. We have stopped counting down her days here and now we begin counting up the days until we are with her again there. We feel as if we have finished a marathon. Exhausted, but we have run a … Continue reading It’s Over
Martha’s Garden
One thing Mom and Dad have always had in common is their love for flowers. Wildflowers particularly, but any flowers are a treat. I remember, when I was a kid, Dad would get up early and go for a hike on the mountain. Probably to take pictures. He would bring back a plethora of flowers … Continue reading Martha’s Garden
Jimmy and Marie
I met Jimmy through my dad. They are in the same support group of men caring for their wives who have dementia. The group has grown, but Dad and Jimmy were part of the original three. Their friendship is born from the shared pain and vulnerability of being caregivers. Dad gave Jimmy Words to the … Continue reading Jimmy and Marie
Sharing Loss
Photo: Mike Hunter (the day they brought her home from the shelter) The dementia journey is fraught with loss. At every turn, your loved one is fading away which causes its own sort of slow dying process in your heart as a caregiver. Your emotional state is tied to their wellbeing; each step of their … Continue reading Sharing Loss
Cranberry Sauce
Sometimes grief comes galloping into the heart like a battering ram at the front door, forcing its way inside. Other times grief sneaks in the back door, like a thief, and makes its way to the table. On big days, such as Thanksgiving, the heart knows to guard the front door. All the memories come … Continue reading Cranberry Sauce
Michelle's Mosaic 