I have been asked this question more than once, “How can you let Hannah go around the world like that?” It was not in any way asked with rude intent, but a genuine heart of how hard it must be to let my girl go. However, I need to make it very clear…I do not LET her do anything. She is an adult, she chooses. I am the mother of an adult, I encourage her. That said, my answer to the question is, “How could I not let her go?”
Until 6 years ago, I think I would have been having a difficult time with the whole thing. But since 6 years ago, I have preached to live fully. Go for it. No regrets. Follow your heart. It is the difference between before cancer, and after. Before, I thought my children were my own. Having to face the fact that I may not be around, caused me to relinquish them. Before, I thought security was best because it was a safer way. Now, I say take risks. For me to take a risk means hiking a mountain, riding a horse, or doing a zip line. That is what I do to take a risk. However, for my kids…the definition of living fully is bigger than that. For them big dreams, like a trip around the world, or hiking the AT (William’s plan for next summer) are the kind of living fully I have been preaching. How many people say I will do it someday? They put off the tug of their hearts, as if time is assured and the future is a certainty. Once you know that is not the truth, it puts a new light on everything. I had a shift of perspective on living when I thought I might die. All the some days rushed to the front, and the secure everyday routine became a liability.
If nothing else I hope that me living through cancer has taught my kids to step out. You have to go for what God puts in you to do. Planning and waiting for some day may seem the safe way, but it is the risky choices that teach us the most. Not every risky choice will pan out…some may fail miserably, but better to fail than not to have tried.
When Hannah was in Israel some years ago, they planned to go into the West Bank. I was nervous about it and openly said so. She said something to me that stopped me cold. “I’d rather die doing what God told me to do, than to sit home and be safe not following him.” It was a lesson from daughter to mom about trusting God, and living from that place of trust rather than a place of fear. So now, she will go again. This time I am cheering her on, even as I pray for her safety. I am telling her to live fully.
In that spirit, I am hosting an informational meeting Friday night at 7:00 at my home. She will show those in attendance a bit about her trip, including the countries she will be serving in, and what area of ministry her team will be working in. Please come and see my amazing daughter step out into what God has called her to do.