I messed up. Today I had a doctors appointment. It was with my oncologist. He was supposed to go over all of my test results and let me know where we go from here. I arrived at my scheduled time and noticed that there were not many people waiting…unheard of for this doctor. Wow how lucky am I? I thought. Then Bill called to ask where I was I said, ”I am at the doctors office where are you?” He said, “At the doctors office…in Lawrenceville waiting on you.” You probably figured it out already…I went to the wrong office…in Gainesville. It was not a good thing to have my husband and doctor in one office and me in another.
I was so disappointed that I had messed things up so badly. I really wanted to have this appointment to hear what he had to say. I have messed up like this several times lately… Forgetting appointments, messing up on times and schedules. They say chemo causes memory loss…Bill says it is overload from all I have been through and trying to get back into the swing. I don’t know which is right. All I know is that I was embarassed and upset today. Juggling things is what I do… I am good at it…usually. I am trying to learn how to be, now that I am not me exactly. It is like I am turning into Bill! All joking aside, it is frustrating to say the least. I know healing will come and I will get back to “normal” whatever that is. But in the meantime, I am discovering that things are different for me in ways I hadn’t even realized.
Michelle's Mosaic 
Sorry, I’ll apologize ahead of this, but I am chuckling…like I said sorry….You being in one location and Bill in another…well I am chuckling at this. So did Bill take the appointment and sit down and listen to what’s up with your bloodwork???
I bet I know the answer to that one…
I know you are not use to balls at your feet, having been dropped, after all your gaze is up in the air at the balls you have rotating…
Those skills will return. The results will be clear and you will continue to add balls back into the rotations of your life, or will you?
Be careful balls creep up on your and the next thing you know, they are all over the “airspace” in your life! Speaking from big experience here myself…Probably should keep my mouth shut at this season tho…
You might point out the balls in my air and at my toes…
Might get my Mom home this week, now there’s a new set of balls to throw up…(in the air, not out of my gut)right in the middle of my 3ring circus. Agressively moving forward in this level of my life…
jess
Actually Bill did ask the nurse if he could be examined in my place since he doesn’t have any ovaries either…I could hear her howling at that one. He was very gracious to me considering he had to drive an extra three hours for nothing! He had no choice…I was crying.
As for your balls in the air…hang on. There are seasons and you are right, I don’t plan to add as many back as I had before. I know you are in a 5 ball season right now. I am glad your mom might be coming home…I will pray. It is the forgeting major things that is the main stressor for me. Ah well, at least now I can better relate to my husband!