I have a very physical reaction to fear and anxiety. I’m not sure this was always true, but life has brought me a significant number of traumatic events and therefore, when I am nervous for any reason, my heart rate climbs, my hands sweat, and my breathing gets shallow. My stomach does flips with butterflies … Continue reading Fear and Anxiety
Surrender
I had never seen Dad afraid of anything…until Mom got sick. I saw him set his chin with trembling lips. I saw him stand and smile with tearful eyes. I saw him shore himself up with heavy shoulders. Watching him anticipate each new loss was like watching him lose part of himself. Every time Mom … Continue reading Surrender
Tossing and Turning
I can’t sleep. Tossing and turning, turns to wandering thoughts, turns to climbing out of bed and into my writing chair. The little girl inside of me speaks up. She reminds me that when she couldn’t sleep, Dad would let her climb onto his lap in his chair. It was a Lazy Boy that creaked … Continue reading Tossing and Turning
Turtle vs. Jack Rabbit
If Mom and Dad were going to pass according to their personalities, they certainly did it. Mom with her slow pace, attention to detail, relationships that needed time, and her deep faith, which carried her. Dad with his 100-mile-an-hour personality, just-do-it-get-it-over-with style, bulldog determination, and his fierce independence. It really couldn’t be any more Mike … Continue reading Turtle vs. Jack Rabbit
Guest Blog by Peter
I have offered by blog to my family to tell their own stories if they would like. Today is the next guest blog by my son, Peter Gunnin. You could see the dust swirl, through the first ray of sun that started to peek through the curtains. I never could sleep in, even as a … Continue reading Guest Blog by Peter
Guest Blog by David
I have offered by blog to my family to tell their own stories if they would like. Today is the next guest blog by my nephew, David Hunter. A variety of feelings come with death: guilt, sadness, vulnerability, uncertainty, and relief when the loved one is suffering. You never are sure which one will stem … Continue reading Guest Blog by David
The Separation
Since Mom passed in July, the most common question I’ve been asked is, “How is your dad?” Honestly, we were all worried about him, too. We knew it would be a tough transition for him. Even he knew that. He said he wasn’t sure how to be Mike without Martha. They had been together so … Continue reading The Separation
Winks and Nods
Since Mom and Dad have passed, we have seen winks and nods from them. I don't know what you believe about these things, but I believe they are sent to comfort and heal our hearts. We have seen lots of them because we are looking for them. When we did Mom's last rites I told … Continue reading Winks and Nods
Guest Blog by Melinda
I have offered by blog to my family to tell their own stories if they would like. Today is the first guest blog by my sister, Melinda. Today was my first step back into my nurse practitioner role since Dad’s passing. It was hard. Much harder than I thought it would be. I have worked … Continue reading Guest Blog by Melinda
Hi Dad
Hi Dad, It’s been a week since we said goodbye. It is still surreal. I think some parts of my heart still don’t really believe it, but then I start to text or call, and the sting comes flooding back into my eyes. It’s true. The nightmare really happened. Now, time is playing tricks on … Continue reading Hi Dad
Michelle's Mosaic 