I see you. I know you come disguised as a choice. A twisted choice. You start your mind games at a very young age. Laying your trap well ahead. You play the long game. Unsuspecting kids don’t know that. They only see what you lay out before them. Fun or boredom. Cool kid or fuddy-duddy. Party or lonely. The choice seems easy, innocent even. That was your plan all along. Easy “harmless” fun.

The longer you can continue this ruse the more of a chance you have to hook them. They can function, work, play, pay their bills. Grown up from the party days, it all becomes social. Adults are more in control…so they think. They can choose when and what to drink. They are “of age” and therefore, it is legal for them. You build in that false sense of security. All adults drink because they can do it without the consequences they faced when they were younger. You are a sly one, Alcoholism. You use this pride and sense of security to sink your talons deeper into the minds and bodies of your victims.

One day they wake up, it seems to them such a short time, but it’s been years. Years of bowing down to you. You have been the central thread running through every event. Celebrations. Hard times. Weddings. Promotions. Deaths. Breakups. Losses. You become their closest companion. Their secret confidant. No longer out in the open. You closet them away. They find you easier to deal with than their feelings. They love how you numb the pain of life. Because life has become more and more painful. They can’t figure out why they have lost relationships. Why they cannot keep a job. Why they feel so miserable. You have gone from a choice to a disease. They are eaten up. Body, mind, and soul. And still you whisper into their ears that their problems have nothing to do with you. Or with them. It is others who are the problem.

They believe you. You twist it all in their minds. And now, Alcoholism, you begin in earnest to reveal your true self. Not a choice, or a disease, but a thief. One who steals happiness. Relationships. Success. One who steals family. Health. Respect. Trust. Security. Money. You take anything you can get your hands on. You talk your victims into isolating themselves. Because, you tell them, “No one else understands you. You are perfectly capable of living your life without the input of others. Who do they think they are to say you are out of control? Who needs them anyway? Not you. You can handle your own life. How dare they?”

But they can’t. They are functional until they are not. Then they are no longer independent. You have them right where you want them, don’t you? Dependent on you. And they give you everything. Every dime. Every moment of their days, and still you demand more. Thieves are never satisfied if there is more to be gained. You push them. They wind up in trouble with the law for driving at your insistence that they are fine. They wind up unable to pay bills at your insistence that they can fine money for rent later…after the trip to the bar. They wind up without insurance, without a home, without a family, living on the streets. And still you demand more.

The thief that comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Once you have stolen it all, and there is nothing but ruin left you transform once again. A choice, a disease, a thief, and now a murderer. The only thing left to steal is their very breath. You work in their bodies until every system is shutting down. Until they are not even conscious of their health any longer. They only want you. They are devoted slaves. Nothing else matters but you. You have them right where you want them. In the palm of your sweaty hands, where you can crush them and squeeze the breath right out of them. You laugh at their pain. You torture them while they beg you for life again. There is no stopping you at this point. You will not be satisfied until you steal their last breath. Then you will walk away, leaving their shell behind. Moving onto your next victim.

I see you. I know your ways. I know you target families and generations. You have stolen one of ours from us. I know you are powerful, but you are not the most powerful. You trick your victims, but God is not fooled by you. He knows your ways well. He will always set your victims free one way or another. My brother, whom you tormented his whole life, is free from you now. Safe in the arms of God, with Mom and Dad. Free from your bondage. Free from your lies. Free from your thievery. Free from your crushing blows. I thank God for finally answering our prayers and setting Michael free. Not the way we wanted, but maybe a better way for him. You have no power any more. I say go back to the hell from which you came. Leave our family alone. We are not listening to you anymore.

Sincerely,

Michelle