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Week 41…Caregiving takes courage. To get up every day and continue to do the things that must be done without fanfare or recognition takes bravery. It is not the kind of courage that runs into battle with swords drawn. It is quieter than that. It is persevering courage that gets up day after day knowing the day holds hard moments, but it gets up anyway. It is feeding a loved one or dressing them or making sure they are clean. It is administering their medicines, making them comfortable, or helping them in any number of ways. 

No one cheers you on. No one sees the effort it takes. No one else makes the sacrifices. It is a choice you have made. Most days it is not an easy choice, but love infuses you to keep going. On hard days, you have to dig deep into the well of compassion for more fuel. You have to cry out to God for grace. You have to pray with your tears.

Yet, you do it. Day after day. You get out of bed. You do all the things necessary . . . for your loved one. It is thankless serving, most of the time. Hopefully, your serving is appreciated, but appreciation isn’t guaranteed because your loved one has their own burden to bear. They may not consider your sacrifice through their pain or confusion. Some even lash out, making your journey even more valiant. It is no small task you have undertaken.

What you are doing is heroic. Facing hardship, both the known and the unknown, is difficult. It takes grit. It takes determination. It takes dedication, which can wane from time to time when the situation is overwhelming. Yet, you regroup and keep going. You are bold in the face of overwhelming emotions and difficulties—the very picture of what it means to be fearless. Looking all the possibilities of the day in the eye, and saying, “You will not stop me today. My loved one is too important to me. I will go forward despite fear, despite how hard it is, despite all that could happen.”

That, my friend, is courage. You are doing it. You are doing it the best you can. That is all anyone can ask of you. It is all you can ask of yourself. No need to beat yourself up. Instead, recognize the courage it takes to do what you are doing. If your loved one cannot tell you, we will: “Thank you for caring enough to activate the courage within you.”

Inspiration for the Week

And I was with you in weakness and in fear and much trembling.

—1 Corinthians 2:3 ESV

Caregiver, your bravery is remarkable. The fear you feel on the path of caregiving is difficult to swallow, isn’t it? You have not known fear like this before. It is different from what you feel after a swerve in a vehicle or a near miss. Caregiving is fear . . . ongoing. It is more nebulous. It hangs in the back of your mind always, sometimes coming to the forefront, but mostly just sitting like a cloud in your thoughts. It can be conscious or unconscious. Sometimes, when you are feeling overwhelmed or irritated, fear is the cause. You may not see it, but if you dig deep, you will find the culprit hiding underneath it all is fear. 

Beloved, you don’t know where this is all going—if there will be healing or decline. If there will be connection in your loved one’s eyes or if they will be blank. If the illness or disease will take them quickly or if it will be a slow process to the end. So many unknowns. It is hard to live in the unknown, is it not? This is where you will find Me . . . in the unknown. On the days when you are unsure and worn down, look for Me there. 

I will boost your courage—that ability to keep going despite the unknown fears that weigh on you. That thing that rises up in you and says, “Today I will go again.” To feed my loved one. To take my loved one to appointments without answers. To shop for my loved one. To sit with them and be present, even on days when they may not know who I am. To remind them and myself who we are, together and why we matter to one another. It is raw courage to face these day-to-day parts of this path. 

Little lions rise to meet the challenges of each day; they roar and infuse you with the ability you need in each moment. Let them rise. I will hold you. I will undergird your courage with My own. You will feel it coursing through you. Let it come, and then hold onto it, by holding onto Me. I know the place you are in. I know the pain you feel. I know the fear. It is okay to feel it, but not to be crushed by it. Let Me hold you up. I will make sure the fear does not overtake you by giving You my courage. 

Your Response

God, you do not know how brave I want to be. It is hard because________________________. I am feeling ___________________________. My fear is not for____________ or ______________ but it is when ______________________. I don’t know how to ____________________. Can You give me courage to __________________? Can You help me to see bravery as___________________? I need You to hold me up on days ___________________.  Give me Your lion’s heart to ____________________. Tell me how, and I will listen. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Pondering Courage

You may not believe you are being courageous in taking on the caregiving for your loved one. You might feel less than brave on most days. Yet, it is true that you continue to show up every day. The definition of courage is strength in the face of pain or grief; the ability to do something that frightens you. Take a moment to ponder the fact that you are doing something that frightens you because the end is unclear. There is no way to know how this will go or for how long. It requires strength of character, which you may not have even realized you have, until now.

Rise Up

1. What do you think of when you think of courage? Running into battle? Fighting off some foe? Superheroes?
2. Name some courageous people you have known. What makes them so brave? What does that bravery look like day to day?
3. Are there other kinds of courage that you may not have thought of? If so, what are they?
4. Do you have courage? What about your loved one? How does your caregiving journey require courage?
5. Use a dictionary to find a definition for courage and write it in your journal.

Look at the definition carefully. Where do you see yourself in those words? 

1. How does that make you feel? Stronger or less than? Write what you feel when you think of yourself and the definition of courage. 
2. What does God think of courage? Do a Scripture search and find how the word courage is used. 

Write a prayer for courage for your journey. Go back to this prayer whenever you feel afraid. Use it to encourage yourself. 

1. Use your ponderings of courage to rise up along the path you are on. Also use them to lift up your loved one. 

Key Takeaway: You are more courageous than you realize.